If what failed are those dreams, then what
makes of waking!??
These past few days made me realize a lot
after some turns and bends I took. That nothing stands in ones way but the
self, nothing puts down oneself but he who thinks and above all, none raises ones
head up to look on and keep moving but the choice of walking forward. It is all
in oneself. All in me.
But the question is where?! Where’d I go!?
Where am I s’pose to be!? Where was me?!
I was drooling ideas to get this blog entry
to start with, and lo it appeared out of some forgotten memory… a picture.
I rushed to look for it and in a few clicks, I
did.
A kid in a red cape walking proud he was wearing
his favorite super hero’s costume. To care nothing at all of what other people
may say about him… he was just being a kid with his favorite super hero’s cape.
Tell you, I can put a lot of adhesive
thoughts with this and I might lose you to where exactly this blog entry is
heading to.
It shook me, I’ve lost that kid and it hit me
more, I lost myself.
Talking to my partner for some hour ago, he
said randomly…
“I’m just a kid inside…”
It sent that chilly feeling,
penetrating guilt, hatred and self pity. It struck not the bull’s eye but the
hay stack beyond the target.
Where was that kid who used to believe on
things unparalleled, the mere thought that waking up every day is another
moment cherished with friends, listening to the teacher and not minding if you
were too noisy chatting and laughing when getting scoffed at by a pissed
mentor.
Sad to realize I lost that kid, my single
dose of imagination and that colorful memory of innocence… Or did I just grow
up!?
