To Where We Are.

The sea which keeps us apart stays still.

What lies beyond to where you lay is the place the sun rises,

To that place where I slumber is where it sets,

The thought of you sleeping & the joy of waking up with you beside me.

Bed Sheets, Pillows, Roses And Kisses.

This is the first that I’ll be blunt straight with my blog entry. The only time in years I’ll express what I feel the most.

The human arms were made not just to endure the load of working, not just to bring balance to the entire body, neither the human lips spares not only to utter words, throw knowledge & speak thoughts needs saying nor of the human body was never just a whole of a living organism, a system of reactions and feelings & not just some ordinary individual with will & choice… we have been made to pair, to have meaning, to bring closeness, to give, to share… to love.

To sleep & wake up with the one you love in your arms or whichever falls from their own is one of many experiences the lack of appreciation many of us get from having to enjoy casual love making, blissful unsafe sex, temporary euphoria & to all the unwanted sudden needless fleshly longing. 

If I may say it as blunt and be forgiven of what I will intend to write as I do not ask for any apology to what I should be posting… I loved every moment I had with my partner on his second visit.

There was no sweet love making, no resistive force of blissful sex, no euphoria from the longing of flesh just the feeling of closeness, the sweet thought of sleeping together & oxytoxic effect of cuddling. The wishes of longing ending up on each other’s arms, his head on my shoulders, a cuddle here & there, me snuggling when cold & the best moment is waking up next to him with eyes trying to wake up staring at me.

In years, a BED made sense… a hug is true, cuddling is the best feeling one can feel & waking up with him is no dream at all. Bed sheets crumpled for one reason, we had each other that close, no fleshly longing… just sweet cuddling.

I am blunt to what I just said, I missed those times with him & not for the urge of my flesh but the feelings I had when he laid his eyes on me. I love my partner. I love him, really I do.

I am missing him now as he boards his plane. I am missing everyday that I am alone without him, I will miss him even more until the day we will have each other not for a visit but forevermore.

P.S.

a good tumblr entry for everyone else

http://www.fabulousapple.com/2011/01/a-treatise-on-cuddling/

Sweet 7.

1 is for YOU being my ONE & only.

2 is for US being TOGETHER.

3 is for every ‘’I Love You’’. 3 beautiful words we say to each other.

4 is for FOUR-ever we hope to spend with each other.

5 is 526,680 minutes = for every YEAR I’d be LOVE-ing YOU.

6 is for every 60 minutes I spend with you which we usually exceed every night.

7 is the 7th day of December 2011. The day we first met. With that hug we gave to each other proved that I have MISS-ed you from that time on & for every moment I was FAR from YOU.

A short phrase of 7’s for 7 beautiful reasons to share with YOU. I Love You, Mark.

That What Feels Sore Is Missing You.

Give me a kiss, and to that kiss a score;

Then to that twenty, add a hundred more:

A thousand to that hundred:

So kiss on, to make that thousand up a million.

Treble that million, and when that is done,

Let's kiss afresh, as when we first begun.

(as quoted from Romantic Kiss Quotes)

That one moment when I had your lips close to mine,
that one wish I’d longed for come true
and from that day on I can’t help but miss you more.
I need you now & I need you much more.

Tell me one thing,
leave me not to be alone,
forsake the chance I lost a memory of you for when that day comes that I do,
I’d die from the pain I’m causing somewhere in a memory I loved you.

Enviable.

The clarity that one sees is to marvel of the unstained.

Ego Clama Meipsum Somnus

Sonnet 148, Shakespeare

O me! What eyes hath love put in my head,

Which have no correspondence with true sight!

Or, if they have, where is my judgment fled,

That censures falsely what they see aright?

If that be fair whereon my false eyes dote,

What means the world to say it is not so?

If it be not, then love doth well denote

Love’s eye is not so true as all men’s: No,

How can it? O how can love’s eye be true,

That is so vexed with watching and with tears?

No marvel then, though I mistake my view;

The sun itself sees not till heaven clears.

  

O cunning love! With tears thou keep’st me blind,

Lest eyes well seeing thy foul faults should find.

-----

The Unfamiliar Prey

The searing coarseness of the words spoken,

Piercing the inside of that shallow cave,

What bounds from the walls quiver in pain.

What lays beneath howls in abhorrence.

The visitor it has welcomed least of known,

There was what only greetings torn,

For it heeds of only shelter,

Away from the squall it brought along.

The creature inside beg none to give but the cave it lives,

A place for the stranger to dry & be safe.

The voice a chill it makes,

At the tone it despised since then long ago he’d heard.

-----

The Trampled

So what bears the pity!?

The unimaginative & shallow!?

To lay waste on tilted soil,

That such sowed words play & told.

The wind groans as it breathes,

The waves a tide gulped deeper,

Thus the wound it hides upon the hollow cage,

The earth a grumble, it quivers without say.

Bent, the reeds lay withered,

Flowers of sort flattened on foot.

Once this uproar long ago did pass,

Of plead-full bliss, unwanted.

Shallow the gust slowly breathed in,

The soil trembles as answer,

The hollow wound tightens it hold,

The rain starts to pour, slowly & sore.

-----

Then was the prayer that he’d close his eyes,

Not the truth but his abhorred disdained sight,

That he sees tomorrow’s light,

With tear stains of the night.

If Time.

Time /tīm/ (n) the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole.

Time is life’s gift. It is our friend. A scale that defines to what results we can have or be it the very witness to our own demise, at the same it becomes our foe as we hurdle the character of patience and temper, a test of faith and perseverance to gain from what it could give and perhaps it is one of life’s greatest blessing that we just don’t have it as our own but also with everyone else.

As a nurse, time is crucial to my profession. 

A dose missed, is a pound cost more of a cure.

A second gone is a beat to lose.

And for every ounce of time spent, a soul is mended.

It takes the patience of one to find beauty with time.

Become his friend and one reaps the seeds of joy.

Become the enemy of it, a temper of angst endows the intolerant.

It is in its arduous length that one takes the bliss of what lies next.

Time is a choice, a decision that abides to what we make out of it.

Whether we stand still and let it waste.

Or we do something, a change or a result out from it.

Time is what we have to do more for our own.

It is a joy to many who sees the beauty of its indecisiveness.

An escape of a lonely heart to his gusto of indulgence & lore.

A time spent of gratitude to self, a relaxing momentary of decent carelessness.

To just sit down. To look on & marvel.

Time becomes our strength when complexities arise.

A point to repatriate the losses of life’s battle.

A moment to gamble when everything seems in chaos.

A strategic stance against the forlorn dismembering hurdles of the world.

Though at chances time becomes in its innocent ardor, a play of fate.

We miss a moment to capture that ruins the self.

We take for granted the joys that hassles undermines and hide.

We fear the thought of longing, we rush the pace.

And to those that time can become such a grueling test.

A risk to take, of unknown destinies.

Of the will to wait, at end or how it’d be!?

If time is no a friend or foe, for how long, when and at life’s breaking end!?

And just because time was not good to me, have the chances made me sour and still, think not that I am gone, think not that I befall such forlorn reason… I am just a soul at mending, a heart longing... A being who waits in time, hoping & wishing.