Sunday, February 13, 2011

Trees & Power Lines

Weekend afternoons were the same if and when I don’t do some good walks to my grandparent’s house and this one just made some productive proof of its solace fun.

After a good rant-off from my mom, I decided to pass away that guilt feeling of putting so much hate on some petty thing by doing my usual afternoon walk, bathed in cold water since it has been raining come by morning only to stop by mid afternoon, clothed up and grab the rest of my phone as I switched to a recorded song I play like every day.

Gloomy, like always and there fewer people playing some good hoops, others just standing along some store waiting for the next gossip to spur out and a share of rattling vehicles going to and fro. I was no stranger to the path I take, even how I do change blocks whenever I go to my grandparents house only to end in the same curve up to their door step. One thing’s for sure, this isn’t any ordinary afternoon.

One thing caught my eye and of all, my mind. Power lines & the amicably positioned trees rowed in the same way those electric lines crawl through the entire subdivision. Like I said I was no stranger or is it just the entire feeling of having’ my emotions pour out with the abysmal weather makes these simple things become quite a fascination!?! And so I thought…

These power lines, solely connecting every dotted place on earth, the very soul of communication that many thought in some way a pester that infers the panoramic view of the sky yet we barely recognize the use of these cables stringing every single thing we need, from wired calls, instant text messages, computer connections and even the source of electricity. Contemplating… trying all hard to be all knowing for all of a sudden. I put out a laugh.

The perfectly rowed trees… I gestured, leaving that silly smile wounding through my face. I was not innocent how I used to climb them all, almost falling from them, carving some random thought from my mind & how I loved being on top of the highest branch fearing if I fall and at the same time loving the thrill of swaying with the wind. I was one with it. Now, I can barely look at them… amazed of how those grooves in its trunk were formed, naturally or by a bare man’s hand.

Slowly then, it took me all back another trip going home to do some more viewing on my intelligent victims and mooning over the idea of a good cold shower on the night to come. Good thing was… I arrived home before it rained. 

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

HAPPY-ness :)

Attending the UP-PGH Convention was the BEST <3
There were new things learned, new knowledge updated & most of all, I have something to share <3

In life, we all searched for happiness… an idea that many of us have longed and will be searching for until we find it, we’ll grab it and never let it go.

Staying young <3
  • Throw out numbers… think not of your age & your weight too.
  • Cheerful friends… have yourself surrounded by laughs and smiles, not with the grumpy ones.
  • Keep learning… life is a long path to learn a lot.
  • Enjoy the simple things… cherish the moments that becomes priceless spent.
  • Laugh often, long & loud… I don’t need to explain further XD
  • Tears happen… cry hard, you need it once in awhile <3
  • Surround with love… love is just the sweetest thing.
  • Healthy… mark your heart, your lungs and your brain.
  • Don’t take guilt trips… no regrets, please.
  • Say, “I Love You” to all…
Happy Guidelines
  • Free from hate
  • Free from worry
  • Live simple
  • Give more
  • Expect less


Be happy, I guess :) a good smile as you start your day, makes a difference to the world :)

Key Note Excerpt from, "At Midlife: The Good Doctor gets Better."

Dr. Eugene F. Ramos, M.D.
Medical City Board Of Directors
Vice Pres. for Medical Services
Director/Chief Operating Officer Medical Arts Tower, Inc.
Director of Proser Health Services, Inc.
Past President of the Philippine College of Physicians

February 3, 2011 La Proa Hall, L'Fisher Hotel, Bacolod City

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Speak no words, Hear none


The park was gloomier than usual, people pass you, birds hover from above and speeding vehicles splash puddles almost anywhere. I come by this only place I can think, unfazed for many times have I ever visited it… to reasons so random or just by a thought out of being alone.

Thinking sorely, I managed to share a distant story…




Once a couple stood side by side,
Hands held close, entwined and bound.
The man higher, lean and broader.
The woman stood fair, in white, slender and stock.

Cruising along a patch of red roses
The woman looked up, answered by a smile.
Took the rose by her hand, pricked a finger or two
In the oddest the man barely noticed.

Red and hot, blood trickled slow,
The woman untangled their hands to the man’s surprise.
She showed him the wound and let out a laugh.

Silent. Meaningless. Vague.

The man shook his head, grabbed the rose
Shocked, the woman stared as blood oozed from his hand.
Yet a smile formed sincerely on his face,
And she let out another laugh.

Silent. Meaningless. Vague.

From afar, I stared at them.

Slowly the woman laid her head close to his chest,
Pulling her closer, placing his arms around.

A bystander sights to his uncommon companion,
“how could they know what one feels when he was deaf & she was mute!?”


It took me a good eavesdropping to share an innocent smile and a guilty nod as the couple passed in front of me.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

I'm Lost

I'm tired of waiting
laying awake in the wee hours
aimlessly thinking of who to find
looking for reasons without answers.

Asking myself why!? 
why should I live?!
to keep fighting
to say I’m brave.

I told myself not to be scared
to hold on tight
standing on every fall
moving at doubt.

Vile as the cold winds at winter
naive like a dead prey
shrouded to rot
rotting into nothingness.

Falling apart
scattered into broken pieces
un-mendable beyond expression
forgotten into history.

Thinking I can end it all
a quick answer
a hastened decision,
a bleed can be the solution.


I'm gone. I'm dead. I'm lost.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

21

Birthdays are fun… and this day wouldn’t be as awesome without gifts so here goes a wish list of freebies just for me to let people I know what to bring me on the day I’ll be celebrating the total end of teen life (I know, teen days were over almost a year ago but being 20 years old is just a transition to this coming-of-age day).




  1. A trip with my Family in a Cruise Ship :)
  2. Int’l Nurse/BON wanna-be/Dialysis Nurse/DR Nurse/Legal Practitioner Nurse/CHN (Being a volunteer makes me half of my profession, still I’m lovin’ the ride)
  3. I’m a total Harry Potter Fan and so… it would really be awesome that I could spend a day with the most awesome people who had been part of my growing life. The infallible trio I’ve cherished to see someday. Book me a ticket to the marvelous city of London! Like now!!!
  4. Since I’ll be booked to the United Kingdom, why not take the chance to be escorted to the Buckingham Palace, eat a hefty breakfast and play cricket with the Royal Family with their Royal Highness, Queen Elizabeth II and her Grandsons, Prince William & Prince Harry.
  5. Like every Christian Dream!!! Sign me up for a VIP ticket to the Vatican!! I want to hear Mass in St. Peter’s Basilica and maybe have some good tea with the Pope!! 
  6. And as a total nerd!!! I want to see C.E.R.N. (Conseil Européen pour la Recherche Nucléaire) and witness the creation of the anti-matter. The most beautiful scene I could witness in my existence.
  7. I want to go to NASA and ride the plane that mimics vacuum in space.
  8. I want to be an instant Multilinguist :)
  9. I want to be signed-up to the UN as an ambassador!!! Please vote for me <3
10.  I want to be the President for one day.
11.  I want the City Mayor of Silay give me the Key to the City (I’m not talking a city in Facebook, ‘coz I’ve been the mayor in there for some time now).
12.  I want to go to Italy to eat pasta, write to Juliet in Venice, to drink wine in Tuscany, & eat pizza at Naples.
13.  A trip to Thailand and meet my new found Fandomes: Pchy, August, Cast Of CLCL.
14.  I want to have an Hermes Bag and have this too… Louis.

http://www.louisvuitton.com/uk/flash/index.jsp?direct1=cate_m&direct2=cat10001&direct3=cat1410015&direct4=cat1410020&campaign=seo/UK/EN/prod

15.  New York $$$ & Paris <3 <3 <3
16.  a Canon camera with 12.5 Megapixel to capture it all :D
17.  A total A&F makeover.

 http://www.abercrombie.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/CategoryDisplay?utm_medium=MensKeyLooks&langId=-1&storeId=11203&parentCategoryId=12202&utm_campaign=12302010DivisionPage&catalogId=10901&categoryId=12226&utm_source=DivisionPage
18.  AussieBum undies too.
19.  I want to meet the VS models, Fashion Designers all over the world.
20.  I want this too… I listed this almost last ‘coz I really don’t have the time to buy it myself… I-Feet/BobShoes.

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=132764506784894&set=t.1206745479&theater

21.  My First Kiss. Geez... do I really need to include this!??

So... I guess I saved you the time in thinking of what to give me on my birthday. These are just a few of what I might want on my birthday. So think about it.

You have like 14 days to go.

xoxo

Thursday, January 6, 2011

I Love The Cemetery

Walking along the cemetery was fine, the weather in its gloomiest scene. The wind cold as it has been for days now, fewer sparrows brave the skies, a sudden hymn came by me and I placed myself in a trance.

From afar, the place looked like a desert of marbles, white cement & greens. I was thinking if ever in any chance possible that I made the cemetery a place of meditation, a prayer room, or some sort of emotional freedom space. In that, I really have a lot of space to become totally free.

I stared at it, looking like a tourist seeing a panoramic view or perhaps some monk finally seeing a paradise to feel the presence of some mystique force. I couldn’t get away with the fact that someday, I’ll be lying my rotting body beneath this land of decay and mundane-ness.
 Yet I find the cemetery an endearing thought worthy of words spared for countless ideation. I could stand there for the entire afternoon, mooning over lost time and searching for some meaning amidst indefinite display of festering and eerie silence.

The sky went deeper in grey and slowly goose bumps crawl through me… like it was some dead person’s fingers tracing my spine, a cold embrace from the surging wind and the blissful feeling of getting a little chill.


I love the cemetery; someday I want to spend time within the bounds of its white walls, crumbling slowly with time, unnerved by some lifeless being haunting the moldering depths of its moisten soil and with its silence killing a child his time, unafraid of what lies beneath the barren white, inspired of it’s perfect calmness.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Finding Peace

The most perfect of afternoons came by with laughs, a good walk and some few stop-over’s at small food booths to lay away hunger and thirst. It was s’pose to be a planned visit weeks before, a small gathering of friends to meet some agendas of a future event to end up with good times from a good company.

That was a couple of hours ago, just a few minutes of bidding goodbyes when this thought came to me.

I love long walks, and going home at the strike of 7pm was nothing so new to me, the night was in its darkest still, fortunately the skies offered consideration for the stars to shine, a bustle of busy night-goers flock the street, for some home will be their stop, to a few unknown to me as the night brings them their foreseen time. I enjoyed these stolen times, a time for myself, a nightly outburst of thoughts and to add, the northeastern wind kissing my uncovered skin.

In all, everything in a blur of ideation… was at peace. Silent. Tranquil.

There are times in life that we search for the better meaning of peace, the thought of even the whole world would succumb and give itself up for an understanding of the word. But for all at stake, blood has to be spilled, relationships broken, foundations crumble… in a point of view I speak nothing of politics, or disbanding wars, and even organizing a movement for world union!?? I don’t!

A simple thought like anything else, I found peace in some way or the other by just walking alone, being one with the night, experiencing to many may think mundane, regular & quite a common moment but on those lengthened strides I did, there was serenity unmistakably felt. A slow yet fulfilling flow of stillness through my veins. Unmasked. Pure.




The query baffles me even more, why do we have to search an endless broad thought when we have had it spent in our lonesome times, at the calmness of our minds and the hushed moments stolen by chance!??